Healing isn't linear. I'm writing this now because I know there will be days that I might relapse again. I want to immortalize these thoughts into words so I can have a reminder to myself. I hope that it can be a reminder to you as well – that emotions are fleeting, but our words and actions are not. I hope we can live with fewer regrets. Also, I believe that if we can be mindful of our emotions, be in touch with it, we can react in a way that won't destroy ourselves and others.
With this, I believe first impression lasts, given that some of my friends still remember. Maybe, firsts are really instilled in our brain hard. Though, I also believe that not all first impressions matter in the long run, especially when it's not the real you. Maybe the first impression says so much about the one taking us in instead of us coming off as something.
I just mentioned on my previous post that I lost the will to blog, but I got an email about my current plan. This year is my 5th year blogging (not that I've been doing it consistently the first 3 years). I asked myself if it is still worth it to renew. Will I lose… Continue reading an email – a reminder to blog?
Before, I really make time for this. No excuses. I will write anything, but maybe that’s when I lost it. I just write, without a purpose. I just write to release. While that is a purpose in itself, it only benefits me. It is different reaching out to people and have your words make its impact, touching other’s heartstrings. I lost that magic, I believe. So maybe—just maybe—I am discouraged? I want my writings to be useful if you know what I mean.
Stories are never my forte. I still believe poetry and blogging are what I’m best at. In poems, I don’t have to build characters and plot—I just follow my heart. In blogging, I just casually talk to you—like writing in a diary. Creating an entire world of your own, characters, settings, main and side stories, well, it’s SO hard.