Junice: You must be brave when you fall in love. ‘Cause you give him the power to break your entire being.

Vienna: It would be a privilege to have my heart broken by him. TFIOS reference! He’s worth it. I know I won’t be bitter whatsoever if this ends (again) badly.

Junice: Even with yourself? Like maybe there’s something you should’ve done. I’m like that. I don’t know, I blame myself so I ended up being bitter to myself. This is my dilemma. He’s worth it but then my mind would be like: “Don’t think about that. You don’t know what the future holds.” Then I’ll be “Just be happy.”It’s like my ego and super ego are fighting.

Vienna: Not even with myself. I’m too much and not enough at the same time. I’ve learned so much when Pol and I broke up then. I can’t blame myself because I know I’m a good girlfriend (you know it! Hahaha!) but I can’t blame him either if he thinks I’m not good enough. You can’t blame things for not working out the way we want it to. I get easily stressed out so I’m slowly learning how to detach from this and that.

When a relationship ends, and you are the one who got left behind, tendency is that you question yourself: “Wasn’t I good enough?”, “Is there something I should have done?” Or shouldn’t have, for that matter. I know exactly how it feels like. It’s like your self-worth got beaten up badly. But then I realized why should you be bitter over a past relationship? It made you happy once. It taught you something. You meet someone for a reason. It will always be a part of you. Isn’t it what love does? It makes you then it breaks you. To love is to destroy. You just have to learn how to detach yourself from the things that no longer let you grow. Detach yourself from the things that no longer serve you happiness. Free yourself.

“Detachment doesn’t mean you don’t let the experience penetrate you. On the contrary, you let it penetrate you fully. That’s how you are able to leave it.”

— Tuesdays with Morrie, Mitch Albom

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Posted by:vienna noreen

vienna is a highly caffeinated writer who aspires to make a difference through her words; if she's not writing, she's probably reading books and fangirling over Bangtan.

4 replies on “DETACHMENT

  1. Great realization.. and so beautifully put too. My favorite: “It made you happy once. It taught you something. You meet someone for a reason. It will always be a part of you. Isn’t it what love does? It makes you then it breaks you.”

    It is even more true when we remember that “breaking” is not necessarily a bad thing. It’s painful, yes. But to break is to start anew, to be more mendable.. and to chip away our illusions of self importance. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Great post.

    But when you say, “When a relationship ends, and you are the one who got left behind…” is this not your occurring? And our occurring is not reality and therefore would be different from someone else’s , isn’t it?

    So what if you could shift your occurring to say, “When a relationship ends, you are the one who has moved on…”, what kind of questions would then come up?

    Shakti

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I don’t think there’ll be anymore question if that so or perhaps it’d just be like: “you deserve the kind of love you would give someone else.” and “I hope he has moved on now, too.”

      Like

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